Mosaic Momma

Today I saw a social media post about a group that will no longer be singing The Star Spangled Banner before their events. Their reasoning was the troubling slaver-owner history of Francis Scott Key  and a problematic line referencing slavery in the third stanza of the poem (eventually set to song). My first thought was, Yikes! This is going to make a LOT of people angry. My second thought was meh...I'm not particularly fond of the song. It's hard to sing for most people. I also feel like it puts the focus on our flag (a piece of fabric) and nationalism rather than a tribute for the country, which I think I good national anthem should do. I'm more fond of  America the Beautiful. On one hand, I could hold that many people would have strong feelings about changing something they see as a sacred song of our country. But on the other hand, I know that The Star-Spangled Banner as our national anthem has only been a thing since 1931. Yes, that's a long time, but it's no...

Gazing out from Bell Rock at beautiful Sedona, AZ Have you ever walked away from someone or something for a season and wondered if you were really done and then something happens and it lets you know that you are  definitely  done? I had that happen today. I have been on a journey the last four years that has been incredibly painful but also full of growth and hope and new opportunities. I always thought I would have written my way through it but there were a lot of things that kept me from doing so.  One was my own self-imposed silence to preserve the peace or not offend. (Sidenote: I know there might be some who follow me on social media thinking, " that was you holding BACK ??") And yes, it was. I fully give myself many kudos from not unleashing my inner dam upon humanity.  As a matter of record, I still don't go looking to do that, folks. But I also don't want to stay silent on things that matter to me because it may make someone else feel uncomfor...

  If I had our wedding to do over again, I would not wear a veil. Twenty-one years ago, I happily picked out the headpiece and enough material to create both a veil and blusher that hid my face as I walked down the aisle to matrimony. This is what my mother did and so this is the way I thought it was done. To be hidden behind a gauzy piece of material breathlessly waiting to be given and to be seen. To cross over from one phase of life and to start another. But I never asked myself, what purpose do veils serve?  To cover. To hide. To shield.  To say, “Not for you. Not now. Not yet”  In the book of Exodus, the presence of God upon Moses was so intense that the Israelites begged Moses to put on a veil because his glowing face from Divine proximity was just too much. I think we like things to be shielded. I think somewhere within our humanity, we’d rather intense and uncomfortable things stay behind veils. We don’t really want th...

This past week, I have had the privilege of watching a very good friend -- a kindred spirit -- fully inhabit her gifting as an artist. Like many women, Sarah wears many hats in her life. She is a wife, a mother, a homeschooling parent, a teacher (voice and art), and more. She has been raising three young men for the past seventeen years and as we all know, that job is all-consuming. It often does not leave much time for anything else. And yet, she has carved out the time to create. She has made it a point (with the nudging and support of her husband and three sons) to dedicate time to creating and putting out beauty into the world. And it is so very beautiful. Sarah is the one in the middle in vibrant, colorful blue! While they were visiting our area of California last week, I got to see her in action in several venues and it was a great joy to see her shine in that space. I knew her way before the art exhibit, the painting classes, and magazine spreads. She is the sa...

I have been thinking a lot recently about the word, "complicit." Our current news cycle is filled with the uncovering of the abuse of power across many different institutions from USA Gymnastics, US politics, and evangelical mega denominations. Most people, however, will never experience abuse at this level. Instead, many of us will experience it in our local gym, at our county chambers, or in our local church. Those of us who have been abused and are still reeling and healing from it often try to make sense out of how it happened. We ask ourselves why. Why me? Did I do something? Why them? Is there something damaged inside of him or her? It is rare that abuse happens in a vacuum and it is rare that we are the first to suffer at the hands of an abuser. It is also rare for the abuser to act alone. In almost every occurrence, there are those who may not be directly involved but are complicit in the abuse. One of the definitions of  complicit  is "involved wit...

Why?? Why do I do it?  Why do I even bother to click on these news stories of old white dude after old white dude saying stupid word salad about something they know nothing about. I think perhaps I dare to hope that one of them will surprise me and have a heart and a conscience and speak out on the side of women who tell their stories of sexual assault. Not surprisingly, the article I just read was more of the same sewage many a white dude-bro compatriot has been trotting out, including Franklin Graham’s gem from last week. This one takes the proverbial cake.  However, it’s a cake made out of crap. take the cake To be the worst in a series of negative actions. Here is the article  -- in all of its hair-pulling entirety -- should you enjoy eating crap cake or are just curious as to how far mankind has sunk. (Spoiler alert: it’s really low.) Kevin Cramer is a Congressman in the House of Representatives for North Dakota. He announc...

Dear America, I have heard many people refer to you as the Land of Opportunity . Today, I have an amazing opportunity to share with you. I wish I could say it's a once in a lifetime deal, but you've been down this road before. Take a deep breath and a giant step back and look at the state of our Country. We are hanging on to our cultural integrity by the slimmest of threads. Lady Liberty's gown is showing some serious tatters as she tries to use her torch to light our way through this mess. The opportunity is one that you've had before over the centuries.. However, time and again you have refused to acknowledge and change. So, as with most things of this nature, opportunity has once again presented herself. And once again, you have the opportunity to make a different choice. Here it is...don't miss it. Are women who allege sexual assault worthy of your belief and trust? No, don't frame it within the current political morass of the Kavanaugh...

Photo Credit Tonight I feel ill. I just walked in the door from a long day spent away from home. The kids were a bit crazy. My head was already starting to pound. And then I opened up Facebook. And my vision went Red . Post after post in my feed was about Franklin Graham's latest "profound comments" on the political and culture landscape of our country. The headlines under the last post I scrolled by had me gasping in disbelief. "Franklin Graham on Judge Kavanaugh Accusation: 'Not Relevant' " Surprising even myself, I chose to click on the news article from CBN (Christian Broadcasting Network), a conservative Christian news site that normally I would steer away from to get a bit more objectivity.  You can image my shock when I realized that the writer, Heather Sells, was not playing in her scathing recounting of Graham's disgusting and tone-deaf comments regarding the Kavanaugh sexual assault allegations. ...

To be alive and paying attention in American society means that you are aware of the collective rage and pain of generations of women who are finding their voice and courage to share their #MeToo stories. And for every one that you hear, I can almost guarantee you that there are likely five more  you are not hearing and maybe never will. The statistics vary, but in the year of 2018, it is said that one out of every three women has been sexually assaulted in her lifetime. This is staggering.  Look around you. Are there any women currently in your line of sight? I see one daughter putting away dinner and through the door, another one working on her math homework. Between the three of us, one of us has been or will be sexually assaulted. (Actually one of us has already been, but I'll tell that particular story another day.) Now look further out to the classroom in which you learn or teach -- to the gym you work out at -- and yes, even at the church you a...

I swear that the Facebook TimeHop feature is the source of both laughter and grief on a daily basis. And many times it's both...at the same time. My babies insist on getting older by the minute and sometimes seeing their little faces from even a year ago (let alone several years ago) steals my breath away. It's the cruel irony of motherhood that we are raising our kids to be independent and leave us behind. We want this for them, but at the same time, we want to press them close to our bodies and never let go. Ouch. Today, I saw a post I had written in 2011 about how I hated the kids' homework as much as they did and that's why I would never homeschool. Little did I know, that a few months later we'd be pulling our two girls out of school and...homeschooling them. Oh life. We think we have you all figured out and then you come along and smash our ideals, show us another perspective, bump into our pride, and basically upend what we thought was normal. ...

It is apparent to me that the Church is going through an identity crisis of epic proportion -- both as an institution and as a group of believers. I'll save the former for another blog post because in this post, I'd like to dialogue about the identity crisis of the latter. As mentioned in recent posts, I have been going through my own personal identity crisis and wilderness experience, which I have started  writing about  and will continue to write about. In the last few years, I have wrestled with how to address and give voice to the warning flags I feel compelled to raise, yet not lecture or alienate people whom I deeply love and with whom I have relationship. And so I have stayed quiet for the most part...at least publicly. After receiving a fair amount of push back for speaking out, I retreated inward and saved these conversations with my trusted few and Twitter. To be honest, it's felt lonely at times because I have not heard a lot of other voices speaking ...